Final Reflections

It seems like just yesterday I was first preparing for my trip to Uganda. I remember having so many different ideas about what this year would be like, most of which ended up being completely off the mark. As much as you can try to prepare yourself for an experience such as this, eventually you just have to make the jump and see where it takes you. So now, one year later, I'm back home in America, trying to reflect on how these past ten months have impacted me, what I learned from living in Uganda, how my experience has shaped me and changed my outlook on many different issues facing our world today.

Living in a foreign country, in a small community, with none of the comforts I have grown up accustomed to being surrounded by in the U.S., proved to be a very difficult experience. I tend to think of myself as someone who is capable of "roughing it," but it was still tough. That being said, the hardest part about my experience in Uganda was being constantly labeled and identified as an outsider. Growing up on Bainbridge Island, and then attending the University of Illinois, I had never really encountered issues of race before. I have always been very sheltered from racial tensions, and this was the first time that I not only experienced race playing a huge role in my day to day living, but I also experienced being the minority, something I probably never would have experienced had I continued to live solely in the U.S. While the people whom I encountered never had malicious intentions concerning racial issus, the racial divide in Africa does carry very strong stereotypes. Disproving those stereotypes, or even trying to have a simple conversation about them was nearly impossible, as people simply couldn't believe that just because someone is white does not mean that they have a lot of money, or that the job market in the U.S. isn't easy to break into, or that the economy is struggling and the price of commodity goods worldwide is increasing. It was hard to try and convince people that there are problems all over the world, not just in Africa.

So that was the toughest part, trying to break these misconceptions that Africans have about the world, and about me as a white person. But the more time I spent in Uganda, the more I realized that I was learning just as much about their culture and the plight of Africans as I thought I was teaching them. I wish that I could say that I walked away from this year feeling good about the direction that the world is headed, that all of these aid organizations are really making a difference. But I can't say that. The world is messed up. People are running away from their homes because of civil wars that have been dragging on for years, seeking asylum in countries that don't really want them there and aren't shy about admitting that. Families with ten kids can get relocated to the U.S. by UNHCR and receive monthly stipends for up to six months upon arrival, at which point the parents are expected to have found jobs. Americans are having tough times finding jobs within six months, how can we expect these refugees who speak limited English and are dropped into a culture that is so radically different than what they have ever experienced to find jobs in six months? Sure, they'll take the jobs that no one wants, hotel maids, taxi drivers, etc. But then how do you support ten kids on the small salaries gleaned from those kinds of jobs? In the long run, is the UN really helping these people, or just making life more difficult for them? The only benefit to this whole process that I can identify is that the kids of those families will be exposed to a better education in the U.S. than they ever could have hoped to receive at home in Africa.

And really, that's the only way out, the only way to break the cycle of poverty that grips an entire continent. Education. The education system in Uganda is so inadequate. However, the small minority of children who push themselves, and read books outside of class, and truly do have a hunger for knowledge, they are the only ones who will have the chance to change their circumstances. Unfortunately it is hard to find kids like that in a culture that doesn't encourage intellectual curiosity, in a culture where it is totally acceptable for a kid to drop out of school for good in sixth grade simply because the family either doesn't have the money, or doesn't think it's important enough, to continue paying school fees.

As I look back on my experience in Uganda though, while I am confident that I learned a lot, the best part of this past year has been the relationships that were formed. True, it was tough living in Africa for ten months. However, had I not been there for as long as I was, then I wouldn't have gotten to see Eddy break out of his shell. When we arrived in August, he was a quiet kid with a stutter who was scared to even catch us looking at him. Upon our departure in June, he had become a leader, was at our house daily, and was constantly chatting with us and his friends.

If I hadn't roughed it for ten months, I wouldn't have seen Nalule write out her dream of becoming a professional footballer and the steps she would have to take to get there. She grew from being one of the slackers, always trying to cut corners at practice, avoiding fitness at all costs, to being a captain. To setting the bar for her teammates and talking excitedly about how she was going to achieve her goal. The last two months I was there, I didn't have to remind her once not to slack off, because she was now setting the tone. She was asked to join an elite girls team in the area, and she might be eligible for a scholarship to secondary school next year to play for the girl's football team.

And if I had only been there a short time, I wouldn't have seen the transformation that Charles experienced. When I first met him, he was a gangly, socially awkward kid at Lubugumu Primary School. He didn't have any friends, and was often picked on because he is a Sudanese refugee, but he loved playing football. We helped transfer him to HOPE Primary School so that he could be in classes with other refugee students and wouldn't be viewed as such an outcast. He never missed a training session, and since his house was near the Youth Center, he was always hanging around, participating in every activity that we had. Soon, he had made many new friends, and could always be seen with a huge smile plastered to his face.

These are just three stories that I will carry with me and cherish for the rest of my life. I learned so much about the world this past year, but what I value the most was taking the time to actually learn the stories these kids have to tell. To really invest in someone else, to give of myself and to figure out how to help and inspire these kids to be confident and chase after their dreams. I do believe that I am more empathetic and compassionate towards people who are struggling than I was a year ago. I have always believed in the quintessential American dream, that if you work hard, you'll earn what you deserve. I still believe in that, but I've also realized that the world and its problems fit mostly in the gray area, and not as much in the black or white.

So, to wrap up, I want to say thank you to everyone who has read this blog over the past ten months. Thank you so much to my family and friends who have supported me financially, and especially emotionally, this past year. I have been so blessed by family and mentors and friends at home who have cared enough about me to invest in my life, and I really tried to do the same for the kids that I worked with in Uganda. As I close the door on this chapter of my life, I look forward to what comes next, and I know that everything I went through, observed, learned, and felt while living in Uganda and working with, playing with, and loving the kids there will forever impact the person who I am becoming.